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If You Knew Would You Believe It

by Graham Hunt

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1.
We were born underneath a blanket See the world through a tiny eye slit That was enough so you never left it Float through time on a crooked orbit Viral violence is all that I’ve seen Commodify everything about me You’re so concerned that I’m being used You only care cause you never had to You made friends of convenience and you made friends to survive You never felt a connection til you were 25 And you work yourself up wondering if I meant it Tell me baby how is that different You don’t speak you just point your finger Somebody else can pull that trigger I just stare and wait for an answer I ain’t ashamed but I ain’t proud either Can’t find the switch so I pull out the plug Disconnect from the myth of self love It will get played out and when it does Will you still think you’re watching from above
2.
Deal in Air 02:50
Spring 08 Market tanked Sorting out The real and fake I had to take a road and not stand at the fork You gotta travel to get back to where you were Colored hair against the backdrop of the snow What was going on there, I wanted to know They were underage but they’d just walk in the bar Stand around or pogo to an Exploited song Suburban kids pushed each other And they wore camo shorts They hadn’t put the time in They weren’t gettin hurt And the real punks Weren’t afraid to break the glass But I had a funny feeling They were living in the past And it took so long to realize it’s not me Years of choices added up just for you to see Unironed thoughts, digital hygiene Somebody’s idea of geography Now I’m trying to keep everything from Falling apart What started as a war story Turned into a farce I got people on one side of me Repeating lines And the guy on the other side he Won’t read the signs And somebody said we got the same 24 But it feels like the hours used to give more So I self destruct just to ward off their stare They are nothing like us they deal in air
3.
Atwood 02:55
You ever get the feeling you've been doing it wrong squatting down at bus stops in people’s yards what you wanna be don't match who you are I like how you say hello instead of hey the color of your eyes when you're drunk in the day but I wish you wouldn't give all your secrets away round in circles in the summer it just happened and it won't again and if I die the way I'm feeling I'll stay like this forever I'll feel this way forever  are the waves amber or are they grey could any two people be more the same fate is good to those who remember their shame struggled up to Atwood she takes her bow falls out of her pocket picture of Mao  I think that she's made it with somebody now  I can't call you if I'm smoking cuz you don't do that no more so I'll wrestle with this guitar get some truth to match this chord  but by then I didn't want no answers it just happened and it won't again and if I die the way I'm feeling I'll stay that way forever I'll feel this way forever
4.
Participate in paranoia of the time Tiny eyes big sockets, cybercrime Smoke get’s so thick it starts to feel dire Factory strobes and industrial fire Suddenly it clears and all the lights are turning green You’re burning your scraps from the kings and their queens When it goes right you just lose your mind Then you expect everything to work out fine Like it was meant to be like it wasn’t a fluke As if god pays more attention to you And suddenly it’s obscured and all the lights are turning red You wish you kept your scraps and your hospital bed Freedom makes new prisons can’t you see I want you to visualize your enemy Three times for the first time stop Don’t you remind me how sure of myself I was
5.
Learned how to sing from Coyotes howling Learned how to talk from muffled voices though the wall It was never money Leading me from one to the other It was that I just can’t stand the thought of letting go now I’m speeding towards a wall Painted like a beach And I know it’s fake But there ain’t no breaks In the suit I bought Now it won’t come off Climb the ladder dig the hole deeper It’s not too far gone you know there is still time to spare To make it and be forgotten before there is no air Buy a ticket catch a plane push out of our heads That one day in our lives we won’t be doing it
6.
And we’ll die in the same hospital we were born in Moment of bliss interrupted by a stroke Thinking about the home we were torn from 9 parts cruel world one part hope I saw six men all standing over something They parked their cars in the ambulances way I shut the door and ran out of the building I’m not sure what else that you want me to say It’s 2 in the morning and we’re out on the back porch Inside the loading dock a man with a blow torch I slipped you 100 to put on a race horse But it won’t make it there and you’ll find a new source In the ghost years so do what you may I’ve been doing it for so long somebody owes me back pay You roll your eyes when I say that and think of boarding a flight But it occurs to you there’s no one to invite And any fool knows that a crow ain’t a crow It’s always watching and waiting for your cards to show And where is the package, it never got sent But don’t even lie you know exactly where the time went
7.
Stripes 03:27
Moonlight window shade stripes on my ceiling Through haze of sleep they look like prison bars Sky's lit up and its 3am All that snow and not one star Every night it’s always the same thing Nowhere to go out to Stuck inside my 300 square foot box where all my money goes to Got 3 more months til it’s through The plants in the laundromat don’t look to pleasant The only light that they get is fluorescent And I don’t know the weight of what with which I’m messing And sometimes that’s a curse and sometimes that’s a blessing I got tired of doing the same thing so I turned on the light Locked the door and headed out All I hear's the buzz of the street light Something don’t feel right
8.
There’s something between us It’s an act for us both to say that it doesn’t exist If we overlook it I don’t think it’ll up and disappear into the mist But I’ve got something going on at home And I’m not sure where it’s headed If I even wanna let it go If she’s already made that decision Things get bad every time that I start tryin And you can’t win a war if you don’t know why you’re fighting A baby with an old man’s face on the bus And his mom’s got the same brown coat as you People say they like it Everywhere you go they say they like the things you say and do In the four block radius of your house Or when you’re on vacation I’m not sure if I’d even call it that You just drink in different places You tell me you like it I think you’re lying And you can’t win a war if you don’t know why you’re fighting You were still on my mind when I hit my stop and I found my keys were missing Down on the terrace, it’s the territory of the people always fishing When they get a bite do they got a plug or do they release it But I’m thinking that they’re on to something as I walk to my mechanic Outside he’s got a weed leaf flag that he’s flying If there ever was a war I don’t know why I’d fight it
9.
Everything you thought Magic as a kid In a different light Light is getting dim A man with a PA Singing in the lot Does he ambition Is it a job Black-pilled children dragged by their parents Hide behind the stable, face on the cement And I don’t remember much but the winning pony Circling the track 7 foot stud Jockeys on the ground playing in the mud He calls himself the wolf king Of New York But I don’t know why I thought he rode a horse Don’t have your mind made up before you know I thought as I looked at the highway out the window Bag men carrying laptops made of bones Kwik-Trip gas station, talking on the phone I was in the basement I was trying to kill the power They said that I can’t leave until I let the feeling pass And if they come in last then they get the incinerator And if they come in first then they just sit in their own mess

about

Available 6/10/2022 on cassette and streaming via SMOKING ROOM

credits

released June 10, 2022

Recorded and Mixed by:
Isaac deBroux-Slone Graham Hunt and Shannon Connor

Performances by:
Shannon Connor (guitar tracks 1 and 4, keys tracks 3 and 7, harmonica track 8)
Isaac deBroux-Slone (drums track 2, guitar track 3, keys track 4)
Sahan Jayasuriya (drum loops tracks 1, 3 and 5)
Randal Bravery (drum loops tracks 4 and 7)
Emili Earhart (keys track 9)
Alicia Bognanno (backup vocals track 3)
Arielle Smith (backup vocals track 7)
Tyler Fassnacht (bass track 2)
Graham hunt (everything else)

Mastered by:
Justin Perkins at Mystery Room Mastering

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Graham Hunt Madison, Wisconsin

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